January 03, 2006

Tick Tag Two

I'm pretty much used to various labels- even reconciled myself to idiotic ones like 'special' child! But was not used to tags. First it was by AfricaBleu and then it was Artsymama who tagged me! I took on the might of Becky by refusing defiantly (have I got that right now!?!) to carry on the meme, but now, emboldened by the mighty Scott-sman himself am bold to meme and be done with the same.

Seven

Before I die, these seven things I've to do
Shed inhibitions, get about,
Scuba dive, glide, fly. But shoo,
there are other things I could never do
move my two left feet or care a jot
to sing in tune, sulk for long, smoke pot,
run or have matching shoes and a neat hair do.

This brings me to what I fancy in my man-
bright eyes, sweet ears n' lips, a nice nose,
brains to wit, brawn that looks good in repose
and yes, suitable taste in prose.
Keeping me company in my throes
I acknowledge his presence the best I can.

The seven things I say most often
don't merit such consideration
common expressions of shock, delight, affection
cogitation, action, negation and in addition,
tremendous consternation
on the sins and virtues 'seven'

The celebrity crushes I've had
in typical random order are:
Will Smith, Pierce Brosnan, Milind Soman,
Michael Holding, dare I slip in John
Abraham, Viv Richards and (my first!) the hockey Somayya
thats just some of them, not bad!

Five

For the bees in my bonnet
Could I have come up with less
Than a Shakespearean sonnet?
And for this, S & C I bless

Stranger folk are said to be
Inhabiting the land
so why not me
and my quirks- not so grand?

Capricious, unfocussed and confused
I swear I snore
hold my rigid views
And am a deadly bore

Signing off with both these tags, Whew
without a-tagging any of you.

10 comments:

arvindiyer said...

WHere in the world did John Abraham come in the scene...*walks away disappointed* I thought u had amazing taste...tch tch tch

scott said...

This response is brilliant and poetic. You have quite a mind. Thanks.

Hello, Shankari.

Prithi Shetty said...

Rhyming meme. Wow ! this is unique.

Anonymous said...

Loved reading that

Shankari said...

My faint attempts at poetry have even drawn some kind advice from the Great Men of Metre. I share two here as illustrations:


Nice verses there, I must here admit
With engaging pontifications, to wit
But a straitjacket verser, such as I am
Found the metres meandering a tad, ma'am
JJ, the Venerable Scorekeeper of the network
Shall, I hope, measure their virtues, not shirk
Sans prejudice then, to their inner meaning
and your words that leave much for gleaning,
On Thinking Studs, and such oxymorons
Shakespearean sonnets on he-manly charms
Said with panache, in fancy fantasies
Stright from the shoulders, no parantheses!

But a-tag remains then (to me), still a mystery
Though I gather that it offers some Web chemistry
A strip-tease-of-sorts on one's identity,
presuming these things are a bit witty.

As I part, I offer some sagely advice
Though your verses and words are rather nice
Twould be well, if they were here pasted
Just on your blog, they may be wasted
The mouse allows you to exist in two places
A luxury that we can't afford with our faces
So I importune you, you lover of words
Mom and wife that makes rice and curds
May your verses grow, and go on to flourish
May they our limited minds, verily nourish!

And this...

as you profess novicehood in the matter of verse
mind if I make a couple points on your likeable
poems? The 2nd -- perhaps for being so terse --
especially appeals. Being tagged -- to one psychable
-- might psyche her in or out (as case may vary)
a pleasant verbal sport no matter if sedentary

A small quibble I have with Seven appears at the start:
> Before I die, these seven things I've to do
> Shed inhibitions, get about,
> Scuba dive, glide, fly.

but . . . that's (in eight words) only five things!

Also, in terms of the form of this poem,
its four stanzas all have six lines each,
except the first which has seven. If it
were possible (with more work) to make the
first uniform with those that follow in this
regard, it would pull the poem more fully
into a sense of formal organization. (This
is a thing one learns to do with some work
and practice of course!) Then, too, in terms
of a rhyme scheme, the middle two stanzas
both exhibit a neat and novel rhyme scheme
of ABBBBA ! quite good!
Had you been able to pull that off in all 4
stanzas, that would have made the whole
poem more of a feat. Of course it's not
always possible to do such things and
still say what one feels one wants/needs
to say. Merely noting how the rhyme
scheme of the poem wanders around a bit
(similar to the number-of-lines-in-stanza
in that respect).

Well, analyzed a different way, one could
say the rhyme scheme in the 3rd stanza is
like this: ABCCBA -- also quite likeable.

Clearly you're experimenting and trying
things out. Good! That's as important
as "succeeding" at some particular little
given form, I dare say. Good to mess
around and see what you can do . . .

And of course you ultimately can decide
how formal or "informal" you want your
poems to be. Blank verse remains an
option -- but for this kind of poem, there's
charm involved in simultaneously stating
information, plus jumping rope at same time!

I'd say you demonstrate that, and the
discovery of that.

Naresh said...

Awesome response...
n ur poetic talents r cool!

Happy New Year!

Innocent Bullet said...

Oh this was delightful! I loved the word play and the underlying cheerfulness in your verses.

And also the unusual usage 'a-tagging' at the end of the sonnet. :-)

Cheers

Dan

Shankari said...

Thank you all!

I've been plagued by complaints from near and far that I seem to have forgotten or omitted the Big B. Hey, this is a list of MY celeb crushes! And Arvind, which woman in her right mind could omit John? Yes, I agree I have amazing taste, even at this age! :p

AfricaBleu said...

Hee, hee. Nii-iice, Shankari.

I was amused (and amazed) by your poet teacher in the comments. He or she forgot to mention that a sonnet is fourteen lines (Yeah, I'm gearing up to teach on TUESDAY - aargh!).

I think you should rhyme ALL your posts, from now on - I love it. And not time consuming at all, right? (sarcastic tone there).

As for my "might," I'm always glad to intimidate... :)

Shankari said...

Hey Becky,
It was not for nothing that I told you I should be in the front row of your class.
Yes, like Marwell, had I but world enough, and time... lol