When I met these two, I was much more rash and brash than I am today.
Yes, we did bond immediately and that bond did carry us through for all these years. Anyone I want or need to, I can reach out to these friends and talk on the phone wherever in the world they may be, as if they be sitting right next to me and as if we have still been meeting everyday. As with most relationships, we did become quite a habit for each other and the growing gaps in time before we met or spoke with each other, was irrelevant because we were assured of being there for each other, weren't we? Which is when we started taking each other for granted. I was totally unaware of anything going wrong. Perceptive dd asked me one day why my friend Uncle J had stopped coming by. 'O, he must be busy sweetheart', I said and forgot about it. Yes, I should have made a call, reached out, but didn't. A month later, another friend casually asked me when I'd spoken to J last. Hmm, been a while, I said. That day I did ring up though. And was totally blown away by what I heard. It seems that I had, in a totally insensitive fashion, hurt my friend with some idiotic words! And without any malafides too!
'Hey, whats the matter, you don't expect me to say the right things all the time do you? And what are friends for, if we had to watch all we say to them?' I did the silly thing of trying to trivialise the hurt I'd caused. Which did its bit to drive the wedge deeper.
Well slowly it was out- friends tried to intervene- much amateur counselling was done. I was given the mandatory advice on how to learn to be sensitive to the feelings of others. Have learnt some protocol, but is it easy for me to learn these lessons?
I tweedle on.
Yes, we did bond immediately and that bond did carry us through for all these years. Anyone I want or need to, I can reach out to these friends and talk on the phone wherever in the world they may be, as if they be sitting right next to me and as if we have still been meeting everyday. As with most relationships, we did become quite a habit for each other and the growing gaps in time before we met or spoke with each other, was irrelevant because we were assured of being there for each other, weren't we? Which is when we started taking each other for granted. I was totally unaware of anything going wrong. Perceptive dd asked me one day why my friend Uncle J had stopped coming by. 'O, he must be busy sweetheart', I said and forgot about it. Yes, I should have made a call, reached out, but didn't. A month later, another friend casually asked me when I'd spoken to J last. Hmm, been a while, I said. That day I did ring up though. And was totally blown away by what I heard. It seems that I had, in a totally insensitive fashion, hurt my friend with some idiotic words! And without any malafides too!
'Hey, whats the matter, you don't expect me to say the right things all the time do you? And what are friends for, if we had to watch all we say to them?' I did the silly thing of trying to trivialise the hurt I'd caused. Which did its bit to drive the wedge deeper.
Well slowly it was out- friends tried to intervene- much amateur counselling was done. I was given the mandatory advice on how to learn to be sensitive to the feelings of others. Have learnt some protocol, but is it easy for me to learn these lessons?
I tweedle on.
5 comments:
Good luck with your tweedling!
Ciao chica...hope all is well.
Thanks Teri,
Well enough. ;)
hey dear,
All sounds too familiar to me. I thought it was only me who say the wrong things at wrong times.
So, I am left with one and only understanding friend in you. I know I have hurt you many a times, believe me all were unintentional. Today, I take this oppty to apologise to you.
Please enjoy your Australian holiday and stop worrying!
Love u,
Hey Chitra!
And what pray may you be apologising for???
Anyway I am glad I did talk to my 'friend'- so no worry and all. :-)
aah! taking for granted happens in most friendships ..Can be upsetting yes!
:)
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